I let an old friend back into my heart. I'm so afraid of people. I think sometimes I should be more cautious with my love. I've been burned so badly. We once had a church. It was a lovely little church. Nothing fancy, really. Just plain. We had huge dreams for it though and put in a lot of hard work. People came. People went. Some services were full, others we had very few people. We felt His leading to close the doors, so we did.

It's been such a bittersweet journey. We learned a lot. We discovered how quickly people can turn on each other. We always knew it, but it was different seeing it happen so viciously in church. We have learned to smile and keep our mouths shut. We don't say a lot to anyone.

Dh got an invitation to preach for another church. I'm leery, tired of empty promises and lies. I'm amazed at how people can say one thing to your face and then do something totally different behind your back.

I've been doing pretty good with groups of people. I smile, I'm polite, make small talk and such. It's the one on one times I dread, as though someone was picking me apart. It's not easy to be loving and transparent when people are hurting you. I don't know how Jesus did it. It had to be supernatural.